Monday, October 03, 2005

Anger

Today I am angry. Today I am resentful. Today I am tired.

The rage that is boiling within me is unbearable. I want nothing more than to release this anger, this pain, this sadness. I want nothing more than to cry and be held and comforted in a way I have never been.

Everyday is a struggle. Everyday I get sucked down deeper into the abyss of my private hell. Everyday I try to claw my way out only to have the invisible chain that is tied to my ankle pull me back down.

I lost my childhood. I lost my innocence. I lost my capacity to trust. I lost safe boundaries. I lost the ability to have healthy relationships. I lost being able to feel.

I lost my life.

I am putting my everything into healing and am hoping with all hope that I get my life back.

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