I had an incredible dream.
I've been exhausted, I spent the week working in the office, and with starting at 5am I've been dragging myself out of bed at 3:30am meaning I've had almost no sleep all week.
I slept last night. A deep, sweet slumber. It was incredible.
I dreamt about being cared for. About crying, sobbing uncontrollably and having someone hold me. Rubbing my back and just holding me. They didn't talk, just held me. I've never felt so loved or cared for in my life, and even though it was a dream, it was truly amazing.
I cried and cried and just talked. Told them all the horrible things my father did to me. Talked about the rape and how much it hurt and still hurts. How much pain I'm in, how sad and broken I feel. I was real, and this person let me be real and it was amazing.
God, how much I want that in real life.