I'm so tired. I just want to give up. I don't have the energy or the strength to keep fighting this.
I feel so incredibly hopeless.
I'm not worth it. I'm not worth helping.
It's not worth struggling through this. I always end up in the same place - feeling like a piece of a shit.
I'm sad. Beyond sad.
I want to give up. I want to sleep. Forever.
The tears are just pouring out, yet I'm feeling worse. I can't stop them.
I want to hurt myself. I want to cut. Slash. Erase the pain.
I wish I had the courage to just... fuck I don't know. Thoughts of killing myself are running rampant right now. The sweet relief. The end of turmoil.
I'm reading the contract I signed with my counsellor. I can't break it. I want to. I really really want to. But it's not the answer, I have to keep telling myself it's not the answer.
This too shall end.